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The Trouble & Strife

Sometimes the temptation to do a Shirley Valentine is almost too much. I would have said Lord Lucan but apparently they’ve found him (and despite some pretty murderous thoughts this week, I haven’t followed through). Today the only person who is speaking to me is the dog. I am going axe throwing later and I’m considering taking along photographs of my nearest and dearest to use as targets.

Mr V was harrumphing around downstairs earlier. “I had my day planned. My day is not going as planned,” he grumbled. This is because I bagged the shower before him and found cherub 1 was already in there so Mr V went from first in the queue to last.

While I was in the shower I considered my problems and the words of Maggie Thatcher sprang to mind; ‘this lady’s not for turning.’ Although I’m fairly sure Maggie wasn’t suffering from sciatica and trying to reach to wash her bum when she said it.

So, with fresh resolve and other bits, I grabbed cherub 2 and made him come to the shops. On the way there I gave him the same pep talk I’d given myself. I don’t think it had the same impact. I probably should have left out the bit about my bum. We went to the camera shop to order a picture and they gave me a voucher for 50 free photograph prints. I immediately started adding to my axe throwing list.

When we got back Mr V came to tell me how grumpy he was feeling. Being a kind and understanding wife, I gave him the pep talk. He was not impressed either 🤷‍♀️ . Perhaps I should have left out my thoughts about how Britain would cope in the event of a zombie apocalypse. And the bit about my bum. “I am trying to tell you how I’m feeling!” he exclaimed. I did the only reasonable thing. Offered him a picture of me to take to axe throwing.

We’re on the way now. Quick pub stop first. Pretty sure it’ll help with accuracy. Or at least numb the pain of the sciatica!

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