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Important Problems and Chin Hair

Thank goodness it’s Almost Wineday today. Here are all the important problems I’ve been having:

By only looking at adverts for holidays, trained Facebook to fill my feed with mostly beaches and posh hotels. Accidentally looked at an advert for golf shoes. Feed is ruined 😭

People parking too close to my car. Absolutely no consideration for ladies with big bottoms!

Shared haggis with the dog. A few hours later dog shared haggis with the carpet. Many, many times. Dog is clearly English.

Spilt soup all over handbag. The inside 😱 Came home from work with belongings in plastic bag. Husband came home from pub. Explanation of why belongings were in plastic bag and handbag was drying on radiator apparently too complicated for drunk person to understand.

Granny broke the internet again. Love granny but sometimes think she should not be allowed to use anything more technological than a spoon.

Cherub 2 currently in Amsterdam and not replying to loving mother’s texts. When they are this quiet it is usually because shenanigans. Cannot think what shenanigans cherub 2 could be getting up to in Amsterdam 🤷‍♀️

Good news/bad news on facial hair status. Small celebration at work when successfully removed chin hair. Got eyebrows waxed later same day. Looked like I’d been punched in the face. Went for blood test at doctors straight afterwards. Eyes watered in cold air on way in. Nurse thought I was in distress. Said all okay and told her about chin hair celebration to reassure her I was normal person. Am not sure she was convinced.

Decided to cut down on sugar. Reviewed progress the next day. Decided had done very well. Then Mr V asked where the Jaffa Cakes had gone. Told me firmly that cherub 2 was in Amsterdam and if a big lady really did it and ran away then she would not have stopped to stash the wrapper in the wastepaper basket next to my chair 😳

Happy Almost Wineday everyone xx

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