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I Am Not Worthy

Many of my friends are worthy. They post worthy things about the environment and health and going running with their children and so on. I post things about wine and wearing my headphones with no music on just so nobody will talk to me. It has occurred to me that I might not be worthy:

  1. I recycle but only if it’s downstairs rubbish.

  2. I run…to the wine shop. Sometimes I make my family run to the wine shop for me!

  3. I don’t read newspapers or magazines that put women down for their appearance but I have an involuntary 😱 response whenever I see someone who has gone overboard with the fake tan.

  4. I do outdoorsy things. Every summer I spend 2 weeks abroad, sitting outdoors in the sunshine, agreeing with my family that we really ought to get off our backsides and do something. Then we go to the shop for ice cream.

  5. I think pure thoughts. Except when I see men in kilts.

  6. I am the ideal body shape. My ideal body shape.

  7. I am kind. Except to people who write they’re instead of their. Those people deserve everything they get.

  8. I don’t drink too much. Cocktails don’t count.

  9. I believe in live and let live. But if you hurt my children or give me a parking fine I will be your worst nightmare.

  10. I love my kids. But sometimes I hide behind the living room door and stick two fingers up at them. Okay, not just sometimes…

In a world that seems to be striving for excellence, I am cheerfully achieving mediocrity.

I suspect I’m not alone.

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